Chapter 4: Vot is it?
FRODO: (Walks in) Mr. Treelong!
MR T: Ja?
FRODO: Found something on the bowling field. Thought you might want to take a look. (Gives him the star shaped object, Mr. Treelong starts looking at it under a microscope)
MR T: You found zis on ze bowling field, nien?
FRODO: Yeah, on the bowling field.
MR T: I dont know. It iz unidentifiable prezently.
(Crowd begins gathering. Frodo starts to get shoved around like a bowling ball, and there are ruffians laughing at him)
BOROMIR: Ha ha hobbit. Where's your mummy now?
EOWYN: Oh, I'm sorry- she's dead!
(Both cackle and Frodos eyes start to well up with tears and he gets angry.)
FRODO: Dont you ever- EVER say anything about my mum!
EOWYN: Ooooh now look, the orphan's angry!
BOROMIR: Maybe he should run to his daddy- oh I'm sorry, he's dead too!
(Both start laughing again. Frodo wipes his tears away and stands up in front of them)
FRODO: Don't you EVER say anything abut my parents in front of me!
EOWYN: Oooh-
MR T: Now now, ze people do not vant Frodo to get angry, nien?
FRODO: (Eyes are blazing blue, as his temper starts to rise) No sir.
MR T: Good. Now-
LEGOLAS: (Pushes in and looks through the microscope) What do you think Mr. T?
MR T: I vink dat meybe Frodo as found ze new species, nien?
LEGOLAS: A new species?
EOWYN: Frodo!?
BOROMIR: Ha-
MR T: Ah sed, shut it now.
LEGOLAS: So- it looks very familiar to a starfish. Could it possibly be a land species? (Object is still is on the table. Everyone watches closely to see if it makes any movement)
FRODO: It- it looks dead, or asleep, to me, if it is.
LEGOLAS: Could be Frodo.
BOROMIR: Aw look!
EOWYN: It's Frodo the- heinstein!
FRODO: It's einstein.
EOWYN: Heinstein, eintstein, frankenstein, they're all the same.
BOROMIR: No they're not!
EOWYN: Are too!
(Start pushing each other around, until-)
LEGOLAS: Watch it!
BOROMIR: Yeah Eowyn!
EOWYN: Watch it! You spilt my anti aging spray can on the... thing- now and the can's split!
FRODO: Quiet-
(The thing starts to move slightly. Legolas picks the can up, takes the lid off and tips the liquid all over the phylum)
EOWYN: Oi!
FRODO: It- it's resuscitated itself with anti aging spray!
MR T: Vizarre, vewy vizarre. Ah vill check dis out with de university. Meantime. Ah vill get ze caretaker to by diz anti aging spvay so ve can keep it alive (He touches the thing, and one of its arms suddenly falls off and wraps itself around Mr. Treelongs arm, then disappears.)
LEGOLAS: What happened?
MR T: Ah don't know, Vegovas. Ah vill check diz out wiv ze univerzity. Now all go ov to your lezzons. NOW!
FRODO: So- so Legolas
LEGOLAS: Go kid, I haven't got time for this (Starts walking quickly to go outside to his car. Frodo has to run to keep up with him)
FRODO: But- how could it have been a land species of a star fish? That's impossible! We know that all star FISH are sea creatures!
LEGOLAS: (Stops and looks him in the eye) You're pretty smart for a kid-
FRODO: I'm one year younger than you.
LEGOLAS: Whatever. I do these things to make myself sound clever, stupid.
FRODO: Dont call me stupid!
LEGOLAS: You know you have a mouth the size of Mount Doom, not to mention the eyes; that's what gets you into trouble with the seniors.
FRODO: (Sighs and looks at the floor) Yeah... I know...
LEGOLAS: Well don't let that get out ok? Of course I know that's impossible! I'm not stupid.
FRODO: Neither is Mr. Treelong or anyone else.
LEGOLAS: (Smirks) Yes, but they didnt realise did they?
FRODO: (smile) Yeah.
LEGOLAS: Great. Now get out of here. I can't be seen with you.
FRODO: Why not?
LEGOLAS: Be- because I can't.
FRODO: Wha- (Gets pushed off of the car park) Ok, ok! I'm going!
